Did you miss me?
I have been thinking about you non-stop. So much so that I put on my grandmother's CountryWhore lingerie collection and went outside to anally violate a 1989 Toyota Land Cruiser doggy-style whilst whispering your name softly into my expired tabs.
It felt just like I was fucking you- without all the snoring.
But now you're here. Let me make love to you.
And don't worry if my penis smells a little like Valvoline 10W-40 high-mileage motor oil, because the viscosity is great for your vagina. Plus, it guards against leaks, sludge, and unwanted deposits- well, at least that's what it says on the easy-pour spout. Do you mind if I check you for leaks and sludge?
Fine ladies, I'll go take a shower instead. But just know this:
WWHM is back! And it's going to be worse than ever, and that's a promise!
We'll post the worst and strangest personal ads the internet has to offer- all served up by you, my beloved WWHM readers. What else do we have in store for the next few weeks?
We have an informative lesson on the penis coming up, plus an analysis of some sweet sex toys.
So stay tuned ladies, WWHM is making a comeback, just like those retarded kids they used to make after-school specials about.
And we're all going to learn a lesson about Why Women Hate Men.
New posts start tomorrow!